She is given to me in matrimony, by My Father Above,
The Holy One of Jacob. You shall know her as The Virgin of Israel,
Israel is His Land.
She is more wild than fires in a field of thorns, on a hot and dry and late summer day at noon,
in My Golan.
She has the undulating shapes of flames that bring down towers.
Her charm is immediately enchanting,
her eyes entice with suggestion of pleasures and the smiles on her lips promise every kind of joy and happiness imaginable,
and she is a gift to me, a living creation within me and around me, and she is like me,
in Love With Our Artist God Creator.
My love for God is what she loves most about me.
It inspires her to Love God even more.
Before I knew her as an angel, I knew her as the lusts and passions of my heart and flesh, a kind of foreskin of intense longing for the kind of intimacy known between mother and newborn child.
It is natural for a mother to feel towards her infant child's flesh as if it is an extension of her own. It is. She feels the abdominal and teething pains of her offspring, their fevers and frustrations and sudden sense of loss, their grief and their fears, she feels it all.
Sometimes.
Not for me. For the first years of my life she was there and I didn't much concern myself with whether she loved me or not. I assumed with conviction that she did, but in retrospect I remember my growing frustration with her aloofness.
After the age of seven I have no memory of having felt loved by my mother for what I believe to be good reason.
And my father, too, was very reticent emotionally with me, though I loved him with all my heart.
In many ways he was a hero to me. He had actually saved my and my siblings lives from the flames of a fire gone wild in a motel we had a room in, in Phoenix Arizona. Phoenix of all places, with an appropriate name. It is where I got my new name, from Rabinowitz to Robbins. It was the night we had arrived as my father ran away from the havoc made as he became a millionaire.
We were all asleep at about 2:30 A.M. when someone shouted from outside "Fire, Fire, Evacuate your rooms!". So my sister Suzanna, God Bless Her, woke up, sat up, and ran out the room, slamming the glass door shut and it locked automatically.
My father broke it with his fist and saved us, me first, as I was farthest away, awake and very concerned but in no way panicky.
"Cry, Johnny, Cry, so I can find you in the smoke!"
He coughed up black phlegm for weeks, too.
Now I am certain I am loved, as never before.
My Father is The King of Kings, The Master of Masters, The One and Only Lord of Lords,
and He is Telling me, Son, you are the inheritor of my many mansions in all my many kingdoms, you are in charge from here on out.
You will show them all what it means to be my One and Only Little One, Lonely no longer, by reason of matrimony with the Divine Mistress of Everything Feminine in The Universe.
As when I am in love with any woman,
as I have been many times for at least half and hour, I make of her my goddess for the moment,
a gift to the senses from My Father above.
There is always a lesson to be learned in our encounters,
which are splendid synchronized visions, fractal extrapolations of self similarity,
all on an essential theme of self reflection,
because I am told I am made in the image of God.
Certainly this can"t mean my biological body with it's electric fields and brain.
The more I searched for emerging patterns of God's Creativity within my mind,
I found them and was astonished into thoughtless observation of my feelings,
My God, I was swept away!
God is synchronizing every thing that moves within my mind.
The colors and sounds, the smells and taste of my own sweat,
my thoughts and all my sensations, my imagination, My God is showing me His Heart!
He is showing me in the communications of my flesh what it means to be created in His Image.
And it has something to do with how things come together and how they fall apart.
Fire is an agent of the reversal of mass back into energy.
To a certain degree this can cause fusion as when heated, mass becomes more pliant and malleable,
it can melt and mix and become alloyed with other elements and compounds.
But eventually fire tears everything apart.
Oh, and that is what I am about to do. Put the world on fire with Divine Art.
The first is a lesson in poignant irony.
As Regards Coming In My Own Name
As when I am in love with any woman,
as I have been many times for at least half and hour, I make of her my goddess for the moment,
a gift to the senses from My Father above.
There is always a lesson to be learned in our encounters,
which are splendid synchronized visions, fractal extrapolations of self similarity,
all on an essential theme of self reflection,
because I am told I am made in the image of God.
Certainly this can"t mean my biological body with it's electric fields and brain.
The more I searched for emerging patterns of God's Creativity within my mind,
I found them and was astonished into thoughtless observation of my feelings,
My Wonderful Original and Divine God, I was swept away!
God is synchronizing every thing that moves within my mind.
The colors and sounds, the smells and taste of my own sweat,
my thoughts and all my sensations, my imagination, My God is showing me His Heart!
He is showing me in the communications of my flesh what it means to be created in His Image.
And it has something to do with how things come together and how they fall apart.
Fire is an agent of the reversal of mass back into energy.
To a certain degree this can cause fusion as when heated mass becomes more pliant and malleable,
it can melt and mix and become alloyed with other elements and compounds.
But eventually fire tears everything apart.
Oh, and that is what I am about to do. Put the world on fire with Divine Art.
The first is a lesson in poignant irony.
I had no Idea you were on the blogger. I love to read your writing! Intense. <3
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